Awakening As The Light Stretches


Some people, ‘thinking people’ I suppose, may regard personal ‘awakening’ as an ’ascension’, a holisticism word but I cannot think of another. This experience, whatever the word, can be a terrifying, and even painful experience.

It can be a rebound forcing us to bathe in the things we have judged. Often, our judgements are a wall we create around what we are afraid of.

Awakening is a sudden pampered bathing in the life 
we have been preventing ourselves to live. 

We discover the awakening pool when our lives throw us into our true being, when we accept our connection to nature, and being part of life’s journey.

Physically, this can manifest out of scary detrimental circumstances such as breathing problems, tingling sensations where they should not be, and near fainting moments.

Not only does the medical team enter our lives, when this happens, but also the people who call themselves ‘lightworkers’.

To me, the awkward thing about ‘lightworkers’, the folks who ‘hold the light’, is they usually do not seem to carry an instinct of how to serve as ‘darkworkers’. Darkworking we usually need to do for ourselves.


Darkworking seems to be the honest approach to healing, 
refining, the lower vibrational energies passing through us 
from the consciousness pool.

I often compare this life realm to the growing of a flower. In the sunlight the petals and stem are of perfection, Below, within the fermented shite of the soil, the roots are in the dark. They are wiggling, knotting, and hunting for nutrition to sustain the perfection of the flower above. The flower also absorbs light to send down to feed and energise the roots so they can do their thing.

During this balancing of light and dark there are symptoms that we may be surprised to discover are part of our awakening journey.

Physical ailments happen, for sure!

Our body forever calls out to slow down, take time out, and rest, especially during our maturing years. Our bodies needs more downtime than we think and believe.

Think of a greyhound and we think of a fast running dog. I have been a greyhound pet dog owner, and discovered they love their curled up basket time much more than running.

So, we resist giving ourselves the loving care our bodies need. Much of this is due to the ‘do as you are told’ culture we live in, and the intense serving of other people’s expectations.

Ultimately, nature puts us into a situation of being forced to take a break, through an illness.

Of course, being ill is never fun. Sometimes, the illness is so profound that it serves a transition from this life to the afterlife realm, if only for a few seconds. When that happens, the ‘awakening’ is quite a shock as this experience reveals so much.

One thing we must be assured about is that illness is NOT because we have done something wrong.


If we do not fall into a quagmire of illness 
we can fall into a realm of ‘confusion’ 

... that we determine is not our usual way.

When we enter confusion are we really being pushed into the realm of dementia? Usually, no! The end of that tunnel is also ‘awakening’.

As a storyteller I rarely tell battle and hero stories but stories of folklore around the ‘knowing’ that anything ‘created’ must eventually ‘decompose’ and then recycled back into ‘creation’ again.

As individuals we carry egos. They are as much part of us as our head. We try so hard to sustain our egos as constants, resisting change, while the rest of our body is eating, creating, decomposing, shitting.

Ego, suddenly realising our body is doing this, can be very confusing in the mind ... especially during periods of farting.

When a fixed determined ego awakens to the turbulence of our bodies, and turbulence of changing behaviours of others, it may no longer have any idea about who we are and what we are doing.

When our conscious ego driven mind desperately tries to cling to concepts we have lived by it can feel like we are trying to hold on to water.

This confusion continues until we accept it, accept changes, and find peace. We become nourished by the wisdom of uncertainty. That is a very profound ‘awakening’.

If we resist this, then it could be the depression journey we will find ourselves rolled onto.


Depression, when it happened to me, 
seemed to be an illusion of deciding that 
what drives the world did not drive me.

Civilisation suddenly seemed mad, too mad, and I was alienated from it all. I was locked into a ‘no mans land’ between worlds. Attachments and old ways were gone, only emptiness remained. It’s was a sad space. Those of depression who are reading this may relate.

Head chatter had also departed, and the silence seemed boring. I had totally lost who I thought I was.

Wonderfully, I soon recognised stillness as being a precious realm of tranquility, of peace. Once learned, this can usually be called upon at any time.

Depression is darkness we can draw into light, a balancing of light and dark together so they feed each other, like the flower I described earlier. When we are triggered into that by something, that is ‘awakening’.

Once we discover and merge the realm of peace into our lives, we could become like my greyhound pet and prefer to live our lives curled up in a basket.

When we first enter into our ‘awakenings’ we can also become ignited and flamed by excitement and ambition. But this gradually seems to calm into a kind of un-enthusiasm. Its a bit like how a new romance evolves into familiarity.

Any transition between what we thought our life should be to what we are, and are becoming, can fall into becoming unexciting.


Awakening happens when we realise that a slower simple pace
is one of perfect sustainable relaxation.

When life has slowed down, when the stillness of our being starts to become our natural state, we can resonate comfortably with our soft simplicity of reality.

With stillness within us we start to recognise small joyful gifts of life that we used to pass by. We enter the ‘life’ that John Lennon mentioned as he said “life is what happens while we are busy making plans”.

To me, travel can be like this. We can hop around the world, take 1000s of photographs but see and feel very little of where we pass by. Yet from a comfortable seat in our garden for a month, we may see and feel much more.

With me, joyful gifting was watching the birds, butterflies and insects more. The calm of this is priceless.

When we transform our hurried reality into a guided stillness, we live life as a constant stretched light, holding hands with our dark shadow with love.

This is ‘Awakening’ ...


Nuin The Ash ..
from Ogma’s Tale Of The Trees

We yearn for sacred circles.
Circles where nothing harms us
when we enter them.

Sanctuary circles, where within them,
there is no more bias, no more conflict
and no more demands to take more from us.

Forgiveness is the way,
speaks Nuin The Ash

A sailor of the sea of life
tormented by unpredictable swelling seas
and unpredictable calmness of the seas.

A sailor of the sea of life
nourished with fear
that has constipated his whole being.

Became a castaway from his sunken temple ship
sunken outside of where ash trees circled.

Swellings throughout his body
of fluids, fire, excrement and wind
not knowing where to flow for calm.

Swellings exposing his flag
of his singular priesthood of damnation
for the offered gift of guided destiny.

Circling the ash trees no matter where he was.
They were pointing, pointing, pointing.
His swellings swirling, swirling swirling.

The castaway circled and circled
outside the circle of the Nuins, the ashes.
But as he circled
his weakness made him slower and slower.

The slower he moved
a sweetness of fragrance teased him.

A fragrance of sweetness
that became stronger the slower he moved
beckoning him to enter the circle
to feed, be nourished and be at home.

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